Hi friends! A few weeks ago I took a trip home to Wilmington, NC for my friend Jessica’s wedding. It was so nice to be home in the warm weather and with people I love — especially after not having done so for over a year thanks to covid. I was reminded that I am quite the Southern boy, no matter how much I try to avoid it. Nothing makes my heart thump like fried chicken, biscuits, hush puppies, and banana pudding. I miss being by the water all the time, and my signature farmer’s tan took mere moments to return to its full glory.

Growing up gay in the South was quite the journey, and I doubt I could have grown into the person I am today if I was still there (but I’m sure I’d still be awesome). Even in 2021 when I’m at home I am privy to plenty of homophobic comments, the most common ones usually having something to do with the length of my shorts or whatever I’m wearing. It used to really upset me, but nowadays I am more likely to say something equally ignorant back (ironically, of course) or just ignore it entirely. Masculinity is such a fragile, delicate thing (lmao) and it doesn’t like to be threatened or challenged. That being said, I salute the queers who live their lives out and proud in red states. It is certainly not easy.

Now let’s move on to happier things, like the banana pudding. I had some when I was home from a small restaurant, most likely made with Jello pudding mix and Cool Whip, like my Grandma Daisy used to make it. Overly sweet and not a lick of salt to be found. Still good, though. I’ve never really thought I needed to make my own banana pudding recipe because, well, it’s barely a recipe to begin with. I will not be making my own Nilla wafers, so if that’s what you’re here for I’m so sorry to disappoint. If I was a pastry chef in a restaurant making a composed banana pudding dish — LOL at this entire sentence — maybe I’d make my own Nilla wafers, but time is money, honey.

My perfect banana pudding consists of a pastry cream base lightened with whipped cream, ripe bananas, a fresh box of Nilla wafers, and some more whipped cream. It’s easy, quick, cold, delicious, and the obvious choice for summer BBQ parties. If you don’t want to make your own pastry cream, go ahead and get a box of Jello pudding mix and prepare it according to the package. I shan’t be judging, nor partaking…

Recipe Notes: If you don’t have vanilla bean or paste, just add 2 teaspoons of vanilla extract to the finished pudding. This recipe is best prepared the day before you want to serve it, but if you don’t have time on your side, at least 4-6 hours of chilling should do.

Banana Pudding

6 egg yolks
2 cups milk (680g)
1 vanilla bean (or 1 teaspoon vanilla bean paste)
1 cup white sugar (200g)
1/4 cup cornstarch (35g)
3/4 teaspoon salt
2 tablespoons butter (28g)
1 1/2 tablespoons rum (optional)
3 large bananas, sliced thin
1 box Nilla Wafers

For the whipped cream:
2 cups heavy cream (360g)
1 tablespoon sugar
Pinch salt
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
4 tablespoons sour cream

1. Start with the pudding: If using vanilla bean, scrape the pod clean and rub it into the sugar. Place roughly half of the sugar in a medium sized pot and pour in the milk. Place the rest of the sugar in a mixing bowl and whisk in the yolks, cornstarch, and salt until smooth and combined.

2. Heat the milk and sugar mixture over medium until it almost boils, then turn off the heat. Using a ladle, scoop some of the hot milk into the bowl of sugar, cornstarch, and eggs, whisking immediately. Gradually whisk more milk (about 1/2 of what’s in the pot) in until no lumps remain, then pour it back into the pot. Turn the heat back on and bring the mixture to a simmer, whisking constantly. Cook it for about 5 minutes (without stepping away), or until the the custard is very thick and the whisk leaves an indentation when removed. Strain into a plastic container and whisk in the butter and rum. Place plastic wrap over the surface of the pudding and cool to room temperature, then chill until cold.

3. Prepare the whipped cream: add the cream, sugar, and salt to a large bowl and whip to stiff peaks, then fold in the sour cream and vanilla extract. Refrigerate until ready to assemble.

4. Assemble: Fold about half of the whipped cream into the chilled pudding and reserve the rest for layering. In a rectangular baking dish or a large bowl (or anything really!), begin by placing layer of Nilla wafers in the bottom. Top with pudding, then bananas, and lastly a thin layer of the plain whipped cream. Continue this process until all of the ingredients are used, and top it off with a decorative layer of whipped cream if you desire. Wrap the pudding tightly with plastic and chill overnight. Enjoy the next day!